Monday, November 29, 2010

Bush Senior, Forgetting Disdain for “Draft Dodgers,” Endorses Romney for President

By “Pintface” Pete Bogs/BogsBlog

In a recent interview with Larry King, George H.W. Bush said Mitt Romney would make “a very good president.” Curious, as during the 1992 presidential campaign and beyond Bush 41 & Co. made much of Bill Clinton’s Vietnam War-era military service deferment, labeling him a “draft dodger.” Mitt Romney also received a deferment – ostensibly for Mormon missionary work.

A “draft dodger” was someone who got called up but fled to Canada (and also someone I admire, for the record) instead of reporting for duty. In a blatant act of political opportunism, in 1992 Republicants and other consternatives broadened the definition to include anyone who was eligible to serve during that time but didn’t.

By that definition, Mitt Romney is a “draft dodger.” (As are Dick Cheney, Rush Limbaugh and Karl Rove, for that matter.)

Perhaps time (or a faulty memory) has softened Bush’s view on cowardly, un-American “draft dodgers.” Or maybe it’s the same old political bullshit (way redundant, I admit it) that you hold your adversaries to high standards, but not your own people, and bank on no one recognizing your hypocrisy? My memory is not that short, Mr. Former President.

Monday, November 22, 2010

Tiger Tiger Burning Out, Will You Die Without a Doubt(?)

By "Pintface" Pete Bogs/BogsBlog

2022 is the year experts say wild tigers will go extinct if slaughter by humans continues unchecked. Is it any surprise China, a country that never saw an animal it didn’t want to eat or commoditize, is a major culprit? Chinese poachers looking to profit from a country craving meat, skins, health remedies (here’s the real “ancient Chinese secret”) and trophies are killing the big kitties.

But if counter efforts work, the poachers may find themselves endangered. Here’s hoping!

Facing extinction has got to weigh heavy on the tigers’ psyches. I’ll be surprised if there’s not a spate of tiger suicides (and attempts, as was graphically portrayed in the 1998 Eddie Murphy remake of Dr. Doolittle) in the coming years. More existential poetry and songs penned by tigers, too.

And there are other obvious concerns: Isn’t announcing a date certain just waving a white flag of surrender to the terrorists, who can simply wait out the tigers’ extinction?

PS: Sharks are also endangered. Perhaps some of us can form an alliance with all these declining toothy predators, in which they agree to never attack us in return for help saving their tails from oblivion? Seems fair.

PPS: Tiger ... shark. See what I did there?

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Is That a Bomb in Your Underwear, or Are You Just Happy to See Me?

By "Pintface" Pete Bogs/BogsBlog

Airline security is undergoing its own scrutiny as travelers are beginning to object to increasingly invasive measures. John Tyner made news when he not only refused a full-body scan but also the alternate pat-down option, which includes a manual check of the groin through clothing.

It should surprise no one that Tyner wasn't allowed to board his flight. What's troubling is that the TSA threatened him with a lawsuit and a fine if he left the security area. Let me get this straight: Once you get to security you can't go forward or backward without being checked? Can't decide to skip your trip? What the hell?

Tyner left and his incident is now under investigation ... which is probably just a formality since the cops (or their equivalent in any situation) always side with their own, usually saying they "acted appropriately" regardless of the truth. More of these checkpoint incidents are likely to come, so the TSA itself may need to lawyer up.

With a succession of would-be shoe bombers, underwear bombers and liquid-mixing bombers setting our security protocols – and who knows what these crafty, evil pigfuckers will try next – one wonders how long it will be before flying becomes too complicated a proposition to be feasible for most people.