Friday, June 22, 2007

They Ought To Call It "Polygyny"

Some Mormons are trying to have polygamy legalized on the grounds of "religious freedom." (NOTE: Vote Romney '08!)

I may have a one-track mind, but Mormon history aside, I think this is and always has been a big booty call. A Western version of the harem. The end of "Not tonight, I have a headache," because that can be followed by, "Yes, tonight, because I have another wife." Though synchronous ovulation could put a damper on that.

Men have always wanted to have a "selection," so maybe I should envy Mormons? Still, stand-up comedians devote entire routines to the headaches caused by a single wife. Who am I to believe?

I'd say legalize polygamy, if all parties agree to it (Mormon history, even recent, includes forced marriages of teenage girls, a la the Middle East), but only if the church agrees to allow women to have multiple husbands, too. Yup, their very own hare-hims. Anything less proves this to be the chauvinistic practice I already think it is, not some directive from above.

Oh, and tax the shit out of them. LOL

PS: I am thinking about starting a new feature here on BogsBlog called The Road Rage Report. The purpose would be for me to vent here rather than get mad on the road, where it's dangerous. In other words, to protect the American people, including myself.

I drive a long way to work and almost on a daily basis have cause to get very angry at other drivers. I'm not a daredevil driver; I drive just over the speed limit (primarily to avoid run-ins with the law) and typically in the center lane. Just the other day I was in the center lane of the highway, going about 75 mph (the speed limit was 70) and this compact car with a young couple got right up on my rear bumper. Then the guy in the passenger seat starts waving his hand around at me as if to say "Go faster!" That asshole isn't going to pay my speeding ticket, is he? I just shook my head "no." They finally passed me on the left (in the "fast lane"), and as they did I noticed their "Choose Life" license plate. They are apparently very choosy about where and when life is important to them, as their aggressive driving could have harmed a number of people. At that point the little devil guy who sits on my shoulder (you know, the one who fights with the angel guy on the other shoulder over moral dilemmas such as how I should behave) says, "Perhaps you (the occupants of that car) should have been aborted." I'm so ashamed!


LeftLeaningLady said...

Maybe we should all start a feature on our blogs called Road Rage. One of the reasons I believe in gun control is the fact that I know if I owned a gun I would probably shoot people going down the road.

I will confess to being a 'road chatter' and nothing pisses me off more than people talking about taking away my cell phone while I drive. I don't think the goverment should be able to take away my phone until they outlaw drive-thrus (ever tried to dunk a McNugget and drive) and make parents of screaming children pull over until the crying stops.

As far as polygamy goes, I really don't care. I certainly don't want another husband and he is not going to have another wife (although a couple of eunuchs might be nice to cut the grass), but I don't care if it is made legal. Adults only, of course.

And I am fine with taxing the shit out of them!

Pete Bogs said...

LLL - some places have banned smoking while driving... I am as anti-smoking as they come, but I think the car is one of the few places you should be allowed to smoke... as for chatting on phones, as long as you pay attention to the rules road... some people haven't used a turn signal since they got a phone, since that second hand is busy holding the phone... hands-free is a good way to go...

she said...

the probelm on the roads is incivility. you see the worst behavior because the drivers are insulated in steel (or plastic) and can hide just like an anon poster does. grrherhaha

but orlandos' gotten bad. like, atlanta bad. and the corridor between UF and the turnpike is like the autobahn. people pass me like im standing still i ususally average around 82 on that stretch just to go with the flow.

people that ride my ass are the worst. now if its not a highway? i pull the "stop and punch it" which is just like it sounds. i brake hard and then punch it to avoid the rear ending. but i guarantee ya it gives the punk behind me his adrenalin rush for the day.

i read jon krakauers book "under the banner of heaven" was about 2 mormon killers but it also was an examination of pologamy. and it is gross, in my opinion, primarily because every time i see a polygamist he is always, always, butt-ugly.
but look their "wimmen" have got to tell these dolts what time it is.

LeftLeaningLady said...

I am a HUGE believer in turn signals. I use them when I am turning and also (shocking) when I am changing lanes! Most people in the NW portion of the state don't believe in turn signals.

Plus, I am safer now. I used to talk on the phone, smoke AND shift gears. Now I have an automatic!!

I finally figured out how to add a bloglist and I put you on it! I hope you don't mind.

Pete Bogs said...

she - I will occasionally tap the brakes when being followed, but I don't want teaching them a lesson to include a rear-end collision... funny, though, is what will work sometimes - hit your wiper fluid... the spray hits the windshield of the car behind you and they usually do slow down... briefly...

the Mormon marriage thing sounds like porn... some mustachioed nerd paired up with hot chicks... it just ain't right! lol

LLL - thanks for the listing!

Aunty Belle said...

Looky, ya'll...I done read Cormac McCarthy's NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN .

When a naive but pushy girl reporter asks the main character--a Sheriff--why his border county is so crime ridden, he tells her its on account of overlookin' bad manners...

Yeah, folks, I'se thinkin' that is jes' the truth of it: after manners go, the whole communal process unravels.

she said...

LLL: the lack of using turn signals up here in ATL is rampant. and its an act of passive aggressive hostility, i think. especially since traffic is so heavy you need to utilize every opportunity to go ...and the non signal users make that harder.

the dirty bastards!! grrherhaha

If i started posting on traffic i would never stop writing.

Jack K. said...

Every time you find yourself becoming a tad bit riled repeat this mantra, " I am a peaceful driver. I am a peaceful driver."

As for using this site for a road rage rant. Hell, man, it's your site. Call it the way you see it. If I have trouble with it, and I won't, that's my problem not yours.

So go for it, dude.

I'm with you on driving only five over the speed limit. Cruise control helps tremendously.

Polygamy, it only appeases men at the expense of women. It ain't that natural.

However, it would be interesting to get a woman's point of view.


Pete Bogs said...

aunt b - there is a lot of selfishness... many people think it's just their right to be that way... sad...

she - I'm actually for punishing that more aggressively... and don't get me started on cars that are parked across two spots...

jack - thanks for your support... I agree on polygamy, too...

Bird said...

i am not a peaceful driver.
i am not a peaceful driver.

why are there so many effing idots on the road?

why are they aways in my way?
or riding my butt?
or running the red light when i have a green?
or switching lanes abruptly in front of me when we're in a railroad crossing -thus forcing me ot slam on the breaks and come to a full stop on the tracks?

bastards - all of 'em!

Pete Bogs said...

bird - I hear you... kill kill kill!!! LOL