Friday, June 01, 2007

A Blight At The Museum

Possibly the first ever museum devoted to creationism opened early this week in Kentucky, and saw a good share of eager visitors as well as a number of protesters. The latter apparently object to the museum's emphasis on faith over scientific fact. (On that topic, seeing the broad objection to a mandated HPV vaccine for young girls among this museum's demographic, ought not someone open a Genital Wart Museum across the street?)

The Creation Museum, which features a Noah’s Ark replica, tackles the age-old evolutionists’ question, “What about the dinosaurs?” by explaining that Noah made room on the ark for them, too. Can a reprinting of all Bibles, due to the complete omission of those creatures from its pages, be on the horizon? It is fun to picture Noah single-handedly wrangling a couple T. rexes and getting them on that boat.

Apparently Noah must have dumped the terrible lizards overboard sometime during those five months, though, as lions and tigers and bears still exist, but dinosaurs do not. I imagine they were quite a pain to confine and feed at sea. I mean, you saw what happened to that ship's crew at the end of The Lost World, right?

No word on whether the museum has a Garden of Eden replica featuring a naked, anatomically correct Adam and Eve. Though they may have the first couple depicted with that ultra-rare disease that causes green, leafy plants to grow over the genitalia, plantydia. Somehow I imagine only the post-fall, shamed Adam and Eve are represented.

Speaking of which, according to at least one museum exhibit, all animals were vegetarian before Adam and Eve sinned; interesting indeed for me to think that some Christians’ idea of "paradise" includes a vegetarian diet and naked people. Maybe we have more in common than I thought.

I certainly would not make any effort to oppose the opening of such a museum in my neck of the woods (unless public funds were used for it, that is; the $27 million Kentucky museum was privately funded), nor would I flat out refuse to patronize it. But I do have an issue that all employees of the museum must affirm their Christian faith before hiring. Isn't that, like, religious discrimination in the other direction?

Though I suppose all things even out. A Harry Potter theme park is set to open in Florida in 2009, and I am sure it will get its share of pro-creation (see what I did there?), anti-evil protesters, too. Hey, tax-exempt The Holy Land Experience will be just down the street, and I'm sure those folks won't welcome their new occult-oriented neighbors with open arms. Mark my words.

But as some consider Harry Potter an expression of a certain type of faith, albeit a dark one, maybe that theme park should be tax-exempt, too? And while they're at it, why not require a profession of belief in the black arts from all employees? OK all you Central Florida Wiccans, let's get those job applications filled out!

Man, just imagine the protests if the Harry Potter theme park has its own "Gay Days," a la Disney World. I can see the event now, kicked off by a naked Daniel Radcliffe astride his trusty steed, Equus. Satanists and "sodomites," oh my! Oh, this is gonna be fun.


she said...

clearly the first genital warts were actually poison ivy blisters...a double whammy for disobedience to God.

i can hardly wait for the imperial rome theme park...i mean iv'e already got the mascot angle sewn up: t-shirts, stickers, 8 cup bikini tops, and plush Shes.


Pete Bogs said...

she - you and me both... I want the part of Caligula...

she said...

or you could end up as a gladiator who has to wear a giant oxen head with poor visibility, and has only a mace and a stick against an army of tigers, assorted slaves with exotic weapons, and a midget with a net.
good luck bogshond.

Lil Bit said...

Oh great, now EVERY religion is gonna want a freakin' museum.
Can't we all just go to the aquarium and be happy with that? LOL

Aunty Belle said...

Hey ya'll....Ise here in Espana peepin' in on ya'll-- what a fine report ya done give on the Summit. AIn't we had fun?

Bawgs honey, all the menfolk n blogworld is plum pea green wif' envy over yore presence wif' the ladies. Hoo-whee!

I'se goin' ter see what the others had ter say--checkin' ter make shure our important secrets was kept.

Hopin' we can have a regional or even national summit real soon.

Pete Bogs said...

she - I'm Spartacus!

LB - nice to see you here... and ain't it the truth? museums are for paintings and sculptures... not this fairy tale stuff...

aunt b - glad you liked my report! enjoy EspaƱa... stay away from the bullfights

Jack K. said...

ab and I agree on another point of view. I am envious, jealous of your recent get together. Did like the photos though. But, blue dots?

Now for a comment about this post. I wonder how many pregnancies could have been prevented if the funds spent on the museum in Kentucky would have been spent on education and birth control devices for those who wish to be sexually active without concern?

Just a thought.

Pete Bogs said...

jack! welcome... I had a great time, but the gals forced me to censor the pics.... sorry...

great idea for alternate use of funds there... I'd support it!

Sanford B. Hines said...

bogs, Did you score?

May I go next time and score?

Mayden's Voyage said...

Hey Pete :)

There are 2 special pic's for you (no women involved though- sorry!) at MV. I went for a stroll and saw something that made me think of you- so I snapped it :)

I'll have to read up on the Creation Museum :) Hope you are having a good weekend~

Sanford B. Hines said...

You score or what PETE?

Jack K. said...

Sanford, Pete is a gentleman. Gentlemen never tell. The rest of us have to use our imaginations. Careful now. snerx.

Besides who keep score anymore? snerx.

Pete Bogs said...

jack - well said... a gentleman never tells, nor asks... LOL

Bird said...

hahaha - i'm catching up on my blog reads ... the creationism museum. yup, i read about that a bit ago. let's just forget all about science indeed. i don't believe in evolution - oh puleeze!

oh. and sigh. and oh. and geesh louise (genteel talk for jesus h. christ - now what the hell did H stand for? perhaps the museum would know?)


Infinitesimal said...

how about "the creation of genital warts" theme park?

tax free, of course

latex free too!