Friday, September 08, 2006

Dubious Dining Declarations

I’ve seen it a million times on restaurant signs and menus: “Voted best (insert food here)” or “Voted #1, etc.” Really? Do tell!

Typically, a faded newspaper clipping tacked up behind the register, which includes a review of said dining establishment (and that probably has an ad for an upcoming Liberace concert on the side we can’t see) is the bold claim’s only corroboration. Well hey, I’m convinced!

What I’m convinced of is that, when it comes to dining establishments, there ought to be a statute of limitations on the right to claim such a status as “best” or “#1.”


So you won a spelling bee in the third grade; are you still putting it on your resume?

Who cares if you were voted #1 anything by a handful of your closest friends from the neighborhood back in 1981? You can’t rest on your laurels forever.

A close cousin to this type of place is the “world famous” dining establishment. I mean, if you are the Brown Derby, yeah, you may be world famous. But a hole-in-the-wall sandwich shop or oyster bar in Toledo is known worldwide?

So, if I were walking down the street in Istanbul and asked someone what they thought about Joe’s Subs or Guido’s Clam Bar, they’d know what I was talking about and give me an enthusiastic testimonial? Maybe I’ll give that a try sometime.

In the meantime, I think businesses that claim to be world famous should have to receive some official certification and a notarized document stating as much. Otherwise, how do we really know?

But, why should I care, even if it is world famous? Should that influence my dining choices? Hey, they’ve heard of this place in Johannesburg. Let’s eat here!

I swear, all this boastfulness is sometimes enough to put you off your food.

25 comments:

Bird said...

hahahaha - coming soon to a city near you:

the voted best, world-famous (and WORLD CLASS) resting-on-your-laurels seminar.

if i was a dog, i'd snort. i am a bird, so i will twitter instead.

twitter twitter twitter, the voted-best bird blogger exclaimed from the world famous comments platform of the top-rated blog in the sphere: bogsblog.

Paddys_Gal said...

What I love are the pizza boxes that say "you've tried the rest,now try the best." They really have balls to make that kind of assumption.

Pete Bogs said...

bird - thank ya kindly!

pg - exactly... everyone uses the same boxes, and not all pizzas are the best... some of them are crap, or overrated (see "Babe's")

Peaches said...

It is all a matter of taste.

Anonymous said...

Ann Coulter is a piece of shit coward! Ann Coulter does not even have an email address on her site. What does that tell you? I would enjoy my life more if she were dead.

What do you think Bogs?

Anonymous said...

Hey, do you remember "Dirty Dining" on the abc station? I used to really enjoy watching that. It was very informative. I would know what places not to go. It has not been on for a long time. I have a feeling that they got pressure from the restaurant community.

Pete Bogs said...

peaches - it's actually all a matter of marketing... that's the purpose of those dubious claims...

anon - Coulter doesn't look like she dines anywhere... I hope the investigative reporters would not be pressured by restaurants, otherwise what good are they? the stations are probably just taking a break and doing something else...

Jack K. said...

I did I ever tell the time when I was voted the best story (lie) teller in the third grade?

I was running the best restaurant in the galaxy. LMAO

We ate in a restaurant the other evening that had some of the laudatory news articles etched onto brass and displayed in the entryway. The food wasn't that fantastic. And they even managed to drop my wife's plate of remaining food which they were taking back to box up. I think it was the couple we were with. We always have those kind of fun times with them.

It was a bit much.

I agree with your view of such travesties.

Bird said...

aha! jack - you need to add a banner to your blog:

"voted best storyteller"

then, you can run a workshop at the rest-on-your-laurels seminar.

could be lucrative.

Pete Bogs said...

jack, bird - jack will always be the #1 storyteller in third grade... no one can take that away from you... I only object to restaurants trying to coast on an old (or quite possibly fraudulent) story...

Hellpig said...

ANON I find you a hipocrite where's your username? COWARD

Here's how it's done:

Clinton should be tried for not doing his job and letting OBL kill 3000 Americans he is solely responsible for 9/11 like I told you 8 months ago

Randi Rhodes and Al Franken should be shot for treason and sedition.

NYTIMES building should be demolitioned.

ANON show some conviction instead of spewing the party line like a parrot.....

Pete Bogs said...

hell - just don't tell me you catch the "world's best" crabs, ok? and while you're at it, what's with the Dungeness invasion on the East Coast? sounds like a consternative plot to ruin the economy of blue Massachusetts... LOL

Hellpig said...

Actually I only catch the largest in the world....I HATE CRAB would never eat it......East Coast Dungies ? I am unaware of info regarding The poor management of Crab in that area....But like a migratory species every 3rd or 4th year there is always an over abundance it happens to crab,salmon,tuna even caribue and elk,duck and geese......But I am sure you Democites will blame it on the GOP....Kinda like Clinton trying to re-write history

39 days and a wake up,when I get home I will start a new Blogsite

Pete Bogs said...

hell - I read recently that, though Dungies are Pacific crabs, they are showing up in the Atlantic and screwing up the ecosystem... I hate crab, but then again I don't eat any critters...

Bird said...

as pig and bogs are clearly the world's top-rated crab haters, i can lay claim to the title

world's best crab lover.

now that sounds odd, eh?

Jack K. said...

bird, a great idea.

What's a banner?

How do you do it?

I have to have some laurel upon which to rest.

lol

Pete Bogs said...

bird - help yourself to them... I'm sure you can find many places in CA that claim to be "world famous" for crabs, or to have been voted "#1 crab restaurant!" lol

Anonymous said...

i aint afraid of no ghost.

Hellpig said...

Bird if I was to tell you how Crab is prepared in brine then frozen you would never eat another crab in your life...I am more then happy to educate the educator....

Bogs If we had secure borders the dungies would have never made the migration to the east coast...

Well 2day is pigs B-Day and we are moored in Dutch Harbor getting fuel so lucky me I get to drink $5.00 Beers and have a $25.00 small pizza being Sunday the only place that sells alcohol is a Pizza resturant

Pete Bogs said...

hell - beer and pizza are my faves, so that's actually what I did for my last b'day... enjoy yours...

btw, what is the current crab threat level? are we at orange? I can't remember...

Anonymous said...

Bogs. You eat pizza?

Hellpig said...

Bogs Threat level is at BLUE as in Blue kings out of Norton Sound which is where we are heading in about 12 hours.......

Bird said...

educate me pig - crab is prepared in brine, then frozen - so even my "fresh" off the boat crab is frozen? i know fish is often "flash frozen" is that the same?

what's a little brine - the crab is cleaned before it is served, of course.

i am so hungry for crab now. yousa! love it with good wine, garlic bread, and salad (i serve lasagne as well -for those who won't make a whole meal out of the crab and it's a vegie lasagne - see bogs, just for you). after a break during which time guests withdraw to the "smoking room," I serve chocolates and cognac for desert. next time i have a crab party, i shall invite the whole damn blogosphere (what the heck!).

happy birthday pig. i will wish you well as i drink a beer this evening.

i must be getting soft. hahahaha!

Pete Bogs said...

bird - will we throw our glasses in the lit fireplace after we down the cognac? very classy, that!

Zya said...

I agree with your post Bogs - but I've noticed here in the states you all have the Zagat Rating... although that seems to only be a general 'Yay we were noticed by the Zagat people' and sometimes people have the sign up from 1999! While it is great that they were good back then not really relevant 7 years later :P

Anyway.. All this talk about crab is making me hungry!!