Friday, May 19, 2006

Da Finchy Code

I know why the caged bird sings: It's pissed at its community management company for not telling it about the screening of its porch in advance.

Last time I wrote about this I was sure I must have missed the memo that said I would wake up one day to find the construction of a screen in progress on my deck.

I did nothing of the sort.

When I confronted the management about this they said there had initially been no notice, but that it was the contractor's fault. Yes, it was the contractor's responsiblity to notify the management's residents. As if!

The installation of the screen is now finished, by the way.

So, when my lease comes up for renewal, I'm told I'll be paying more rent for a screen I didn't want or even know about. A screen that'll make it difficult to continue feeding my friend, Finchy.

The hell it will. I'm hoping to get out of here when the lease is up.

Maybe I can get a bachelor pad for myself and Finchy somewhere. He can even bring his lady friend, "Filly," over to visit.

There will be rules about this, of course. I will insist Finchy leave a feather on the doorknob when he has "company." I'd hate to interrupt two love-making-birds. TMI!

20 comments:

The Flabbergasted Heathen said...

Have you even ASKED Finchy? Maybe he likes the neighbourhood! Just assuming he'll go with you! Just like a human...

Pete Bogs said...

he can fly in and out anytime he wants... he does so already... besides, he knows who's got the high-quality birdseed...

Bird said...

i'm sure finchy is as annoyed by the new screen as you are.

but,really , bogs - a feather on the doorknob?

and what will you hang on the doorknob?

(strictly a rhetorical question you know - no need to answer!)

Pete Bogs said...

bird - the standard practice for humans is to hang one of the young lady's undergarments from the doorknob to alert your roommate that you have company... at least, that's what television has taught me...

Bird said...

haha - so then i take it that at the young lady's abode, she hangs the guy's boxers or speedos from the doorknob - but what if he goes commando? (what if she goes commando?)

wow - this could be a whole anthropolgogical study - involving...

FIELD WORK.

Pete Bogs said...

what if they go commando? too good to even think about...

if no undergarments are available, taping the condom wrapper to the door will suffice...

The Flabbergasted Heathen said...

Well, if either party is going commando, I guess you could just be very very loud.

Or perhaps flip a deadbolt.

Or one of those red lights you see on movie sets.

Pete Bogs said...

I hope Finchy and Filly are reading these great suggestions...

Jack K. said...

Have you ever thought about the penalty leading to the delinquincy of those younger than you. ha ha ha.

Does anyone know of the ratio of bird years to humans? Isn't it 7 to 1 for dogs?

Does Finchy use condoms?

These are the questions all America has been asking.

Hellpig said...

Jack what kind of car r u ?

Pete Bogs said...

Finchy claims to be "fixed" but there seem to be plenty of bird nests around here...

Zya said...

Owr, you'll be sad leaving finchy...

If you like birds that much, maybe you should consider getting one?

Pete Bogs said...

zya - I know people who have birds... they are noisy and messy indoors... I do like feeding them, though...

besides, I may have figured out how to continue feeding Finchy... stay tuned...

Jack K. said...

hellpig, if I tell you what kind of car I R, I would have to do something to you. Damned senior moments, I can't remember what that something is.

Here is a hint to it's type: I call it my poor man's Ferrari. It is painted Milano Red and the top stows in the boot. They were last produced in 1997.

bogs, I can hardly wait to discover your devious scheme to continue to care for our Finchy. Moving is a laudable thought, but a might bit drastic. Reasonable, but drastic.

Pete Bogs said...

jack - it would not be feasible to move until my lease is up next year... I've been wanting to move anyway... but it won't be anytime soon...

Pete Bogs said...

PS All: Fragmentia 13 for 5/21 is now up...

Jack K. said...

Been there, read that. Thanks.

Hellpig said...

Jack I was just wondering it looks like a miata,how ever you spell it anyhow it's red and looks cool..

Jack K. said...

hellpig, close but no cigar. You are to be rewarded for your perseverance.

It is a 1995 Honda Civic Del Sol with the VTEC engine and a 5-speed.

I thought of replacing it with an S2000, but I don't want to give up the amazing amount of trunk space in the Del Sol.

I can carry my golf clubs and the pull cart too.

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