Wednesday, February 22, 2006

And… CUT!!!

This is about a subject that’s very near and dear to me: The Big Man Downstairs.

I once thought circumcision of infant males was “settled law,” at least in most countries. But apparently it’s not a given.

One former coworker of mine decided not to have his baby boy “cut,” as he said it would traumatize the child. He explained that babies scream bloody murder when they’re being circumcised; considering they react the same way to hunger or dirty diapers, can we really be certain what they’re crying about?

Here’s my traumatic scenario for that youngster: He's in high school, and a cute classmate is about to "make him a man." She gets one look at his uncut alien appendage and says, “You’re not putting that thing in any part of me!” Then she tells all the girls at school about it.

Thanks, Dad and Mom. You guys rock!

There are some grown men out there who feel they were robbed of their little head-hiding hoods when they were just defenseless infants. Helpless babies skinned alive? Oh my!

Some of these guys have gone as far as being “restored,” which entails the grafting of skin onto the, um, unsheathed area. The procedure requires a series of surgeries and costs a minimum of $10,000.00.

Dudes, wtf? Do you want your umbilical cords reattached, or your fontanelles reopened? Leave that thing alone already. It's a done deal.

Should still-uncircumcised men do something about their condition? I’m not going to touch that one now, or ever.

What I will say is that I’m personally grateful my parents made the decision for me. Not only do I not need that appendix of the nether regions, I don’t cherish the thought of having to face a knife-job below the belt as a knowing adult.

I would also like to give thanks and a special shout-out to Jews for popularizing this wonderful practice. To them I say sláinte, which is Irish for, “That’s bris, baby!” (Loosely translated.)


I realize there are cultural differences regarding circumcisions, but right or wrong, a guy growing up in the US (for one) nowadays is likely to have a stigma attached to him if that extra skin isn’t detached from him.

Coming Friday: The female counterpart to this topic.

35 comments:

infinitesimal said...

Well just to go on the record, I think the cut ones are weird looking and the uncut ones are sexy, because you know they are more sensitive that way.

Check out da boyed's site....

Have you ever heard Kathy Griffin's schtick involving a "bucket of clits?"

K9 said...

ja! lady scream bloody terror to at look at seamonster of broek. cut! cut! is clean this way.

(hallo aunty belle i read you from before. come over i have no stomen hete browns or profanity as did K9.)

K9 said...

never mind she say she avoid this post. droevig!

Bird said...

My understanding is that if circumcision is done properly and very early, the kid doesn't feel anything - the kid is still on a high from the endorphins he picked up via mom during the birthing process and that helps null the pain.

On the other hand, let's look at this practice from a different lens: welcome to the world kid, now let me cut off part of your dick. Do you think perhaps there is some sort of deep-rooted trauma you circumcized men suffer all your lives? Maybe that explains why you are the way you are? ;)

Pete Bogs said...

infini - nope, haven't heard the bucket 'o clits stuff...

signed, the weird-looking, unsexy guy... lol

freya - ???

bird, I've heard there may be some resentment, but I think the grown-up male "victims" are just thinking too much...

A good girl NOW! said...

Hey, It wouldn't matter to me either way but I did have sex with a guy when I was in high school who wasn't circumsized. I guess since I was still unworldly so.. pretty tight. He had to get circumsized after that for medical reasons. Thank God the law was abolished when Jesus died for rightousness sake.

Pete Bogs said...

sexual characteristics are a matter of, um, personal taste, as my upcoming Friday blog will further delve into... it's all about what you're used to, I guess... a penis will look strange cut or uncut, depending on what you've experienced before... actually, penises (or penii?) are pretty weird-looking in general... not that women's attributes can't be, too... but the female name is far superior - vagina sounds poetic and exotic, while penis sounds clinical and nerdy... this is turning into another blog, though... I digress...

infinitesimal said...

Bucket o' clits refers to the clitorectomies on the continent of Africa. I thought that was gonna be part of your next post.

Kathy Griffin is a comic.

Man, I gotta headache today...sux.

Thanx for the compliment on my photo.

Paddys_Gal said...

interesting you haven't heard from your male readers yet, pete.

btw, there are two plurals of penis in my dicktionary (sic) ... "penises" or "penes"

presidentbobo said...

I think it is a bad idea. You shouldn't hack off parts from your body - especially for aesthetics - except maybe hair, nails and the odd wart or cancerous mole. If I ever have children I don't plan to cut off any parts from their bodies - male or female. My understanding is that the practice became popular in the USA as a means of discouraging masturbation.

Pete Bogs said...

Infini - I know Kathy Griffin - redhead from a sitcom, right?

I actually did talk about the abhorrent practice of female circumcision in an old blog from last year... that's not even aesthetic, it's misguided religious beliefs... to prevent "impurity" of sexual temptations... btw, I'd never joke about that subject...

PG - I was thinking the same thing... looks like bobo is here now with a male perspective... thanks for clarification on penis! (some people still say "Guinnesses!")

Pres - it never stopped me! HAHA! I don't know what got it started over here, but that's probably one explanation... it's hung on as a tradition, a word which I admittedly do not think much of, but it's what I'm accustomed to...

K9 said...

bobo this cut is for aesthetic purpose. have you ever wonder what is under the long vingernagels of waitress when she bring out you meal? is there some yucky hiddeng there? same thing wit stok sock.

Pete Bogs said...

I've been thinking about some of the comments made on here... my responses, in no particular order:

I guess what a lot of you are saying is, "Respect the cock..."

my deep-rooted trauma is related to growing up Catholic and afraid of death and sin and hell... I don't think that early procedure factored in... yeah, it's kind of a rude awakening to the world, but so is being held upside down by your feet and smacked...

on the sensitivity issue, I've heard that may be true... but, wouldn't extra sensitivity make a man more likely to climax prematurely? that would be a quality issue when it came to sex, I'd think...

I have other thoughts about it but I'm not sure I want to get that explicit here...

presidentbobo said...

The penis looks goofy any way you cut it...
Bogs - I think we should all sit down with a few pints of "Genesis" and discuss this at length (haha).

I understand what your saying freya but you know guys can wash those things. That is why they started hacking them off - because of all the "washing" that was going on.
How about that "old-time" logic? Are you children doing things you dont want them to do? Have you tried mutilating their sex organs

Pete Bogs said...

bobo - I do know there's a ring with sharp points inside that were put on males to keep them from becoming aroused, even in their sleep... it was in one of those catalogues of old-timey gadgets, like you used to see on the table at Wendy's...

funny thing - now some men put rings THRU their members on purpose... "Do you have Prince Albert in your pants? You'd better let him out before he suffocates."

Blue said...

It is very rare for a boy to be circ'd in Oz anymore. When my boy was born I looked into the pro's and con's and talked to dr's who both were & weren't and decided not to.

I figured if it wasn't done b4 we left the hospital - then unless there was a medical necessity it wasn't getting done.

One of my friends has delayed the decision - and now decides she wants her boy done for the following reason: "So he'll look like his dad....." I personally think thats a pretty crap reason for putting a 6month old baby under anasthetic.

I've never been with a guy who wasn't circ'd - so I wouldn't know the diff (*note to self for must do list) but I figure that its not made any difference to the boy - he's never known anything different.

Pete Bogs said...

BB - must do list, I love it!

"Once you go cut, you'll never (something that rhymes with 'cut')!"

I was hoping for some non-American input... I realize the paradigm is different in other countries... and the talk here is that it will become less common as people's attitudes change about it... then I will be positively freakish!

thanks, BB...

infinitesimal said...

I was a nanny in NYC for 2 uncirced boys...they woulf be teens now...anyway, during bathtime their mother instructed me to remind them to perform a "crud-check" and wash well.

I just thought I would share.

Pete Bogs said...

infini - thanks, seriously... my comment above, "I have other thoughts about it but I'm not sure I want to get that explicit here," was an oblique reference to that very issue...

Anonymous said...

there was a small trend back in the late 70s and early to mid 80s - parents determining not to cut their precious little baby boys. My son was born in '84 and I did some serious consideration about whether to circumcise him. two things swayed me: 1) that he would look funny compared to others and be teased in the locker room, and 2) my father commented that it was much more hygienic and that he wished he'd been circumsized (given that this was the ONLY time he ever spoke of anything remotely sexual or having to do with private body parts - I figured this was a big deal.) However, the boy that popped my cherry (to put it so euphemistically - is this expression still used?) was uncircumcised and had no problems in terms of hygiene, nor in terms of satisfying me - he was quite a good lover, though at the time I had no way of knowing. It wasn't until later - after I'd sown a few wild seeds, that I knew to just what extent he was, er, well, terrific. Hmmmm...I don't think I'll sign this comment with my real identity.

Reverend X said...

When I had my sons, twins- almost two years ago, I wrestled with this decision. I weighed each side and finally based my decision on one overriding concern: Which will make oral sex more likely for them when they are teenagers. I know it might sound weird, but anything that will lessen their chances of getting a GF pregnant in high school, is a positive. I remember my adolescence. Kids are not going to abstain no matter what the consequences are. The friends I had growing up who were uncut could not get a blow job with a sack of cocaine tied to their balls. So, I had my kids clipped... If they feel victimized... Whatever

ffff said...

Very personal thing this one. I always like to say to the father's who want it 'done' well could you please be the one to hold down your baby whilst it is being done and please don't forget your daughters while you about it. Look it up. See how it is performed. Wonder how you would like it now let alone then. Why not wait until the child can have anaethestic. But please please educate yourself first.And you shouldn't believe all those stories about 'womens reactions' I have 7 nephews ...only one is circumcised. Guess who is the odd one out???

I agree with blue... for a boy to want his son to 'look like him' is pretty sick. My brother didn't even know our father wasn't ( and he had been born in 1918 and had been through WW11 without any hassles walking across the middle east!!!) but still had his son done. stupid. Look into it. I have heard a baby being done and believe me they cry until they don't breathe. It is torture. If they feel hunger as pain imagine..... urgh

wolf-snaggle-tooth said...

Hooded men ride strong.
With the silver shine on the tip of my sword.
I piece the hyman & together we bleed & create the seed of LIFE..

The poem of the untouched..
wolf-snaggle-tooth

Dont cut the childs cock, it aint the right move..
hows the kid ever going to get into the groove...
Hooded & strong my hooded dong has a certain pong... cheese collects for the annual fondue.. & she tucks in to the rim flavour on cue..

ardlair said...

Ah America, do we not love you.

Only the Americans can equate normality with ill-health.

Your love affair with cosmetic surgery is well known, so I guess it's best to start with the babies.

Frosty Snowbro said...

Where the hell do you come up with these posts, bogs? Anyway, I am half-way = cut but not sewn back. The ladies tell me they like it like that; ads better "traction".

Only thing is I have to wash it all the time so nothing gets between the skin to get infected or any crap like that. I probably hae the most sanitary penis in Georgia.

So my vote? Cut the poor kids. They will thank you for it later.

Blue said...

hey Frosty,

If you have a little girl you have to teach her to clean her bits. Its actually easier to teach a boy to clean their bits - cause they're playing with it anyway - coming out with classic lines like:

Look mummy I made my penis stand to attention (aged 3)

Pete Bogs said...

it's good to see such a diverse range of opinions here...

I'm glad the hygiene topic was brought up... I know some men who don't even bother to get the gunk out from under their nails - and everyone can see that... so I wonder how good they'd be about keeping other places clean... still, as snagglepuss points out, some may savo(u)r the flavo(u)r of fromunda cheese...

reading all this, I have to think back to the women who have "known" my tiny, mutilated American manhood... were they faking all the time? I feel like such an inadequate fool...

Mr Q said...

Cut, Uncut. It does not matter. Being Louis XIII doesn't make you cleaner, being Carrot Top doesn't make you less attractive eihter. Is all in what you do before you get to the playground.
If you know how to play, other will play with you regardless of your "condition". As far as health reasons, completely null and void, this is not the umbilical cord people, the damn thing has the job of protecting the inner skin that is more sensitive, don't you wish you had one when the hot ash fell while you were pissing? Keep it clean gents.
AS far as less BJ's, hygiene is the ruler of all.

Pete Bogs said...

that's the good word, mr q... whatever you do, keep those buggers clean!

Carl said...

What kind of reasons is there for circumcising? Ridiculous ones: junior high gym, the rare woman who cares, the possibility of blow job? For these you will cut 1/2 of the skin off the penis of a newborn baby? And then believe that it doesn't hurt?

It is interesting that the large groups that circumcised are Jews, Muslims, and Americans. And the rate for Americans is down to 60% from 90% a few years ago...

Pete Bogs said...

carl, anything that gets in the way of a bj is a problem for some... just ask my boy, Bill...

there are health issues... it's an area that need extra attention... some guys don't clean under their nails, so why are they going to go to that trouble...

but, it is as always an individual choice...

Hellpig said...

yo wolf what are you doing outta your cage bitch,I told you that the next time you spouted off,the nightly anal probes will be KY'less,remember how long it took for your ass to heal last time..

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Vince said...

The video propaganda by anti-circ activists is misleading and biased. I got circumcised when I was 6 months old because I could not urinate due to phimosis. A lady doctor circumcised me and my parents told me that I did not cry at all. However they did not put any diaper for me and I was kept naked with a bandage, I was told. My mom loved my circumcised penis and she always bragged about that. When my Mom used to undress me to bathe me I did not feel shy but when my aunts and female cousins (all of them are older than me) were around I was embarrassed to get undressed. But my mom showed me to every one. She did not want me to feel shy. I have no regrets about my circumcision.