Wednesday, September 21, 2005

He Would’ve Really Looked Out For The Chicks

Just a few days ago President Bush put forth one Norris Alderson as his choice to head the FDA’s Office of Women’s Health. Alderson, a man, had previously spent many years in the FDA dealing with animal breeding and related issues.

Mr. Alderson’s nomination was inexplicably withdrawn before he could begin his new appointment. It was a loss to us all - but mostly to all the American women who will surely now suffer without his oversight. And his skill in coaxing semen from reluctant bulls.

Was Alderson’s appointment a not-so-subtle White House jibe at feminists, who, among other things, object to the use of animal names to refer to women (fillies, foxes, chicks, etc.)? Or was it just the next in a puzzling pattern of animal-related appointments?

For example, the recently deposed head of FEMA, Michael Brown, had previously been the head of an Arabian horses organization; it was the only “experience” he brought to FEMA.

This begs the question: Will Bush’s next Supreme Court nominee’s prior legal experience consist of running a string of puppy mills in Pennsylvania’s Amish Country?

We can only hope he’s that qualified.